Am I in the wrong for refusing to continue offering free childcare for my stepdaughter?

“I’m sure you mean well,” I said, handing the list back, fighting to keep my voice steady, “but this won’t work for me. You’ll need to find other childcare.”
Their faces fell, but I stood my ground.

Months later, Alice called me in a panic. Her voice cracked with desperation. “Mom, our sitter canceled last minute. Can you watch Ellie tomorrow? Just for the day?”

I hesitated. “You know I won’t be following those rules, right? I’ll provide safe and appropriate care, but I won’t be micromanaged.”
Alice sighed. “That’s fine. We just really need help.”

That “one day” turned into four months. While Alice was somewhat tolerable, Sam was a nightmare. Every time he picked Ellie up, he’d make snide comments about Muffin, the number of kids I had over, or whether I’d cooked that day.

One afternoon, as I read to Ellie and her cousin, Sam arrived early.
“Well, well,” he sneered, “I see we’re breaking rules again. Two kids at once? How dangerous.”

I held Ellie closer, feeling her tiny fingers grip my shirt. “Sam, if you have concerns, we can discuss them like adults. But not in front of the children.”

He scoffed. “I guess we don’t have a choice but to put up with this for now.”
And the other day, he said, “I guess you’re happy you won, Ruby.”

By Sunday nights, I’d started dreading the week ahead. The joy I once felt watching my grandkids was overshadowed by Sam’s constant negativity and Alice’s relentless questioning:

“Did the baby cry? Did you change her diaper twice? Did you feed her?”
I had raised kids on my own — did they really think I was new to this whole motherhood thing? Some days were worse than others, but I let it slide, chalking it up to them being “new parents” trying too hard to get everything right.

Thanksgiving was the breaking point. I’d told Alice and Sam well in advance that I’d have all my grandkids over during the holiday break. But Sam wasn’t happy.

“This isn’t safe,” he said during one particularly tense pickup. “You can’t watch all those kids and take care of Ellie properly.”
“I’ve been doing this for years, Sam,” I said, trying to keep my voice level. “All these children are family. They love each other, they look out for each other, and there’s nothing to worry about here.”

“That’s not good enough,” he interrupted. “Ellie needs individual attention. She needs —”
“Then make other arrangements,” I said calmly.